i'm getting a colonoscopy tomorrow. when i told my friend meredith, she responded with, "what?! why? you're not 50 yet!" no offense to any of my 50-year-old readers.
thankfully, i'll be sedated for the procedure itself. however, today i had to do the bowel prep (also known as a colon prep). this is the worst part of the whole process. it is the part where i clear out my colon in order that the doctors may have a clear look at it tomorrow. so what do i have to do? well, following the doctor's orders, i took the maximum daily dosage of dulcolax and magnesium citrate. i also got a prescription of miralax. on the bottle, it says that the daily dosage is 17 grams. my doctor's orders were to take 255 grams today. so basically i'm sleeping on the toilet tonight.
it's 11 p.m. and i still haven't finished my miralax. i feel completely nauseated because i wasn't allowed to eat anything solid all day. all i've had are a couple popsicles, a cup of tea, peach jello, some white grape juice, and two bowls of plain chicken broth. and of course, all my laxatives and gatorade.
the magnesium citrate was advertised to have a "pleasing lemony flavor." it has turned me off of sprite and 7up forever.
on a lighter note....i had a really nice vacation in montana recently. i went to boarding school in eureka, montana for my last year of high school, so i went back to visit. i hadn't been back there since 2003, and oh how wonderful it was to be back. kenny, my surrogate father at boarding school, has recently gotten his pilot's license and a little plane. so on my first day there, he took my flying in his little orage plane. i actually got to pilot it a bit myself. while i was in control of the flying, and we were caught up in conversation, kenny looked out of the window and said, "oh no! we're in canada. we'd better turn around before the F16's show up." thankfully, nobody showed up and we got out safely.
i also had an unsuccessful day of huckleberry picking. yes, a huckleberry is more than just the name of a mark twain character. they grow all over northwest montana, and they grow only in the wild.
every summer, girl's from the school go huckleberry picking and get gallons and gallons of berries to freeze and use the whole year for pancakes, pies, jams, milkshakes, and smoothies. see all the gallon jugs they're carrying? on a regular huckleberry picking day, those jugs would all be full.
yum. unfortunately, the bears had gotten to the huckleberries in that area before we did. it was still a nice hike. i found my new favorite flower:
we spent the weekend in the canadian rockies at the canmore folk music festival. i love canada for so many reasons, but one of them is that canadians all really appreciate the music of their ancestors regardless of where they came from.
here is a picture of the drive on the way up to the festival:
i'm going to have to finish blogging about canmore later. they told me that the bowel prep would give me the worst diarrhea of my life, but i think they actually meant to say i would be peeing out of my butthole.
1 comment:
peeing out of your butthole....ew.
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